What Makes a Quality Cancer Support Group?

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After attending several cancer support groups, I reflect on what makes them helpful, inclusive and healing — and invite others to share their insights too.

Sue McCarthy received diagnoses of breast cancer in 2001 and lung cancer in 2018. Catch up on all of Sue's blogs here!

I attended my first cancer support group many years ago when my mother was suffering from metastatic breast cancer. It was somewhat comforting and fulfilling to me, and I participated in five or six sessions.

That was before I had received my life-threatening lung cancer diagnosis in 2018 or even learned of my early-stage breast cancer, DCIS, in 2001.

I went to one more (cancer) support meeting in a nearby church on a Sunday afternoon during my non-small-cell-lung cancer treatment journey. I had completed my first round of Cisplatin chemotherapy and had a specific question to ask the group members. I was concerned about my connection with my Medical Oncologist. Prior to chemo, I had had surgery to remove malignant tumors, one from each lung. I had been absolutely satisfied with my Surgical Oncologist, but was initially disappointed when I met Dr. G, who would care for me during my chemotherapy and beyond.

I’m not a very outgoing person and stayed quiet about my breast cancer with all except my closest family and friends, but the severity of my lung disease led me to want to share more about my circumstances even with casual friends. It was immensely comforting to know how many were praying for me. Then I suffered from fatigue and nausea throughout much of my chemo treatment; so despite my resolve to become more social, I didn’t feel up to sharing so many personal thoughts and feelings about cancer with people I barely knew, at a church other than my own. Hence, I didn’t become a member of that group either.

I reached remission about one month before the Coronavirus Pandemic closed down support groups, as well as so many other non-essential businesses and organizations, as well as schools, and even churches. After about another year, they reopened. By then I had completed the initial phase of my cancer treatment journey, and completely coincidentally, joined St. Catherine’s Church, my formerly nearby location of the St. Peregrine’s Cancer Support Group.

As of now, four years have elapsed since I started to regularly attend St. Peregrine’s Group at St. Catherine’s, now my church. Like any other organization, some of our meetings are excellent; others are disappointing. I’ve now taken on a new role in our group. The group’s long-time facilitator continues to lead our sessions; I am now responsible for reaching out to spread the word about St. Peregrine’s.

Some questions regularly come to mind as I mull over what I can and can’t do to see my intention be fulfilled.

Whether or not your cancer journey has included a support group, I would appreciate any ideas you have. If you have been in a support group (even just once), what did you find useful about it? What did not meet your expectation or desires?

If you were a facilitator of a cancer group, how would you run it?

Thanks so much for contributing.

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